Script #1 (Role of Beth)
Beth: Hey Sheila, I just found a very masculine looking cell phone at the coffee shop.
Reader: Really, What are you going to do with it?
Beth: Well, I think this is fate. I mean what if this guy turns out to be Mr. Right?
Reader: You have been watching too much reality TV. What if he turns out to be an ax murderer?
Beth: He can’t be, he has Barney’s on his speed dial.
Reader: Who the heck is Barney’s?
Beth: You know Barney’s, only the best shopping experience ever!
Reader: What pretentious person would have a department store on their speed dial?
Beth: His new girlfriend!!
Script #2 (Role of Alyssa)
Alyssa: How can you say that? You haven’t even met my father.
Reader: I know. I just have a father phobia.
Alyssa: But you have to meet him. He’ll never let me go out with you if you can’t even face him. I mean he looks a little rough when you first see him but once you get to know him…
Reader: What do you mean rough?
Alyssa: Did I say rough? Oh, well that just kind of slipped out. Not really rough. He’s just a little one the edge most of the time.
Reader: On the edge of what? Insanity? Ok, that’s it. I’ll see you later. I just don’t think this is going to work out.
Alyssa: Can anybody say…Old Maid?!
Script #3 (Role of Heather)
Heather: Do you always have to be so cheesy?
Reader: What do you mean?
Heather: You are always coming on to girls telling them how hot and how funny they are.
Reader: No I don’t
Heather: Yes you do! It is so nauseating. Do you honestly think anyone believes a word you say when you say it to everyone? How desperate do you think these girls are?
Reader: I do think you are beautiful.
Heather: Really? Oh, you are so sweet…